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Okay, okay. Knock off the fucking giggling. This isn't a damn comedy. As it happens, the English have been making sausages way longer than the Germans, and as anyone who knows me will tell you, I love sausages. (I know what you're thinking and if you so much as fucking smirk, I swear I'm going reach out and slap the shit out of you.)Right, so I was dithering between the Toad in the Hole and the Bubble and Squeak when I was greeted by a curvaceous woman in a bright red 'Mrs Santa' outfit. She. .. Now I suddenly realised that I might be going to have a problem, because instead of taking his hand out of my trousers he, took them down,off my hips,and also removed my under pants.Well this looks nice ,he said to his friend, yes ripe for fucking, now thats a new word to me, I wonder what it means I thought to myself, I was soon to find out. I started to wriggle trying to get away from his grasp, hold still boy, he said , thats a nice cock you,ve got there,and an even better ass , just. “My wife just doesn’t understand” “Have you talked to her” “Sort of” and his voice trailed off. “Do you want another drink” I offered, he shook his head. “I think I’ll be going” he said, “Do you want a lift?” he nodded and we walked and got in my car. As I drove towards his place he was still talking and could sense his distress so I pulled over.Parking up at the entrance to a cemetery, a quiet area of town, I turned to face him, he was visibly very upset to which he apologised and I said “It. Lycra jeans, and very low rise too, the tiny zipper is half-undone. Her hands go on to her hips and she looks straight at me. "Can I help you?” She gave half a smile and a lick of the lips. "I just want some Danish." "Shame," she says, "I'm all Aussie, but they do make better cakes,” she laughs, and I hear a faint tinkling sound from somewhere, I look round but the door is closed. "You want one, two, or more?” "Oh, more please," I say, watching her nipples have a life of their own through the.
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