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“Shit no, I’m far too fragile, what the hell was I drinking that got me this bad?”“Before, or after those half dozen malt whiskies in that last pub?”I laughed. She groaned and held her head in both hands.“My God, no wonder I was pissed, I didn’t make a real arsehole of myself did I?“No, you were ok in the Pub, well mostly”, I added. “I almost carried you back here. Then I got your real arsehole in the camper after you started acting ‘slutty’. You told me to open some Prosecco, drank a huge. Trust me, I don’t want to go there, either. You’re not a regular human being, so stop acting like one! You’re the Beast, baby! Act like it!“As for regular ol’ Hell, who do you think runs the place and sets the damn rules down there? Jehovah? As if he would condescend that much! I decide who burns, freezes, etc. for how long, etc. Now, that Lake of Fire place, sure Jehovah controls that, but not the original Tophet, trust me. That’s MY motherfucking domain! I’ve been running it for aeons and I. How are you this evening?” I tried to be as nonchalant as I could, but I still had a chubby, although it was quickly fading. To my surprise she smiled.“A secret rendezvous in the dead of night with your lover? Good for you. I thought I recognized your car as I was pulling out from the store” she gestured over her shoulder and I saw her Honda parked a few rows down, “and I just wanted to check and make sure you were okay.” She smiled and winked at me. “Don’t let me hold you up any longer. It’s a. Dennis in the background said, "I'll pick it up in my room."A short time later he picked it up. "Hello honey." he said.We waited for the other phone to be hung up. At last we heard the click. I said, "Look you son of a bitch, I'm gonna make you pay big time." Sam what the hell is the matter with you," he said."What's wrong, That bitch of an alter ego of yours is what is wrong. I've got to stay as a girl, she got Sam grounded. If I want to go out of the house, I've got to be a girl." she said.He.
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